Wasssup???

I don't know another way to say, "Checking in more" or whatever.

So.

I'm much more swollen... actually, my cheeks are super uneven because I fell asleep with the icepack yesterday on my right side (so left in the picture) and so it's just kind of swollen while the other one is in Hamsterville.

Below: my chubby cheeked compatriots. Btw, I recently discovered it's difficult to go, "AWWWW!" when you can't open your mouth...

"Awww---ow!"

Quick story I forgot to include in yesterday's post (ironically, forgot, as you'll see)

Remember the nurse who was like, "no phone!" when I woke up? Well, shortly after as I was more or less adjusted to being in the recovery room and awake, I asked what time it was. "It's been about an hour."
...this is not what I asked. "But what time is it?"
She turned around and looked at me. "I'm not going to be answering any questions till your ride gets here, because you won't remember any of this anyway."
Now, let me tell you: there was a clock ON THE WALL. Right ABOVE HER HEAD. I could see the vague shape of it but since they took my glasses off for the surgery I couldn't actually read it. "But if it's after 9.15 then I have to call a friend (Alex, of @ohokayalex fame) for a ride!"
"Just wait till your ride gets here!"
I reach for my phone again to check the time. "No phone!"
"But do you know if my mom is still here?"
"I'm not going to answer any questions till your ride gets here since you're not going to remember this!"
At this point I start wondering if I'm speaking English. I know I can't talk that well, but I'm pretty sure I should be coherent, especially to someone whose job specifically entails working with drugged up, gauze-mouthed people...
My mom comes in, and the nurse turns to her. "I'm just going to tell you all this because she's not going to remember any of this, so it's pointless talking to her."
She then proceeded to tell my mom all my care instructions and show her (not me, because I won't remember any of this) a short video on the recovery period. And then "helped" me to the car, which seriously was just following me like I'm going to fall over.

Later on, my mom asked, "do you remember the video from this morning?" and I proceeded to recite back to her nearly every instruction given. My mom confirmed what the nurse had said ("it's pointless talking to her") so it's not even like I hallucinated that part or anything.

This whole event makes me FURIOUS. I don't care if 99% of people have amnesia after their surgery. I remember EVERYTHING that happened after waking up and reaching for my phone. Clearly some people remember things, and it would be more prudent for nurses and staff to just assume that patients can remember how they are treated than to be as rude as they want secure in the fact that "I won't remember any of this."

And it's also really maddening because other than that, everyone was so nice to me! The receptionist, who called me Corby even though we all told her multiple times I'm Corbyjane, was still really nice. The ANNA-stesiologist was totally cool and did her best to relax me even though my heartrate was a mile a minute. The doctor was a little obtuse about my meds, but was totally nice. But this nurse apparently thinks she can treat people however she wants because "they won't remember".

Well guess what, lady? I remember. And I am NOT taking this lying down. When I go in for my follow-up I am going to let the doctor know I remember EVERYTHING that happened to me after waking up and I want you to know it, too.

It wouldn't have even bothered me if she'd told my mom, "I'm going to talk to you, because she probably isn't going to remember any of this." But she shrugged off all of my questions, condescended and talked down to me, all because she was so sure she could get away with it. It takes more words to say, "I won't answer any questions," than to just go, "9.05." I mean really.

So I cannot wait for the follow-up.